hehe...back to blogger
i guess the main reason y i buy a domain & hosting is accomplished (which is for testing and playing)
so i don't feel bad having it that way
back to the topic
last week i bought my first ever black jeans trousers (why black and not the common blue jeans?)
to make it short.
I soak it with my favorite white shirt(read menggali shirt) and later it surprise me that the color went all over the other cloth that I soaked with.
so there goes my favorite white shirt.I can't remove the black color as it stain in certain place of the shirt and cannot be remove easily.
well, i guess it time to say good bye to the shirt.it still can be wear though but it wouldn't look nice with the black patches.
looking the situation at different point of view
I guess this is a sign for me from Allah
because this past week i've been what i'm afraid to be (read ichigo vs hollow - and i've been that hollow)
I've done many sinful things this past week,..
I know it is wrong yet I can't control my desire to overcome it
the first time I did it really struck me in the face but then come the second and so forth
it feel like just curiosity that i feed on.
I dunno what kept me from not doing it yet it so hard to overcome it
one day I can keep it off me, yet another day it come to me much more than before
During that time, I remember what I got from usrah umum.
my mas'ul said that "the nature of the sins is that it will attact other sins towards you"..
I definitely agree with the statement, because the moment you decide to commit the sins it is hard for you to turn back as more and more sins will come towards you as if you have nothing else to do rather than committing all the sins.
that where the part white vs black comes in.
that is where this post is all about.
in life ..
one cannot mixed good with bad, black with white, deed with sins
because the nature of the bad itself will attract more bad thing and in the end it will take over good
I said this based on my experience
I've done it before
I've recovered from it before
yet now I've done it again...
and I dunno when I'll fully recover from it
I seek help from Allah through my subconscious and I got my answer from my surrounding
which I can pretty much said that it is an ibrah from a bad situation
Sins is like a cancer"Sometimes you feel that it is good for you yet it is not, and sometimes you feel that what is happening to you is bad yet it is not..and Allah knows best"
if you want to opt it out, you have to completely remove them
don't let even a zarah of it left,..
99.9% is not enough...you have to keep out of it 101%
because a small portion of it can develop into bigger size
and once it become big again...it's hard for you to restrain it
maybe I should do like what the ulama have done before
they keep a lighter in their pocket and when they've done anything wrong they'll lite up and put the fire in their palm..so that it'll remind them of hell fire..
You can feel the impact of doing sins throughout your daily life..
if before you can wake up early, maybe around 4-5am in the morning and pray
then after you've done anything sinful in a day, it definitely hard for you to maintain waking up early.
even you might miss subuh prayer because of waking up late...
that is just a simple sign of doing sinful things
Sometimes I wonder why some people performed well yet they've done sinful thing in their daily life?
so I experiment it myself,..indeed it's true..
but then I think about it again,.deeply think of it..
is Allah agree with our sins thus He gave us success?
is the success that we gain really have barakah in it?
is this the right way to become a successful person?
My dear readers,
success don't comes easily to us,
we need to sacrifice something to gain it..
same like heaven
some people pay the afterlife with their life in the world,..so they get both of it
yet most of people pay the world with their afterlife and so they get the world but not their afterlife
we have to loose something in order to get something
indeed it is true,..
but in Islam..
the equation is different.
1 + 1 doesn't means 2
in a way you might get 2 but in another way you will get 1 again.
so think about it
to me it's better than having a better place in the after life rather than a success in this world
we worked hard
we strive our best
and it's up to Him to give us or not..
myb we'll get it now or maybe we'll get it later
but definitely we will get it...
I guess it's enough for now..
there so much thing I want to write that now it is mixed up and can't be describe well
as a conclusion..
never ever mix up white and black/good and bad